– So I was invited to this thing…the foebook…do you have it?
– I can’t tell you, sorry.
– But you can speak about it, right?
– Yes, I could. You can indeed speak about it.
– I think I can tell you about the invitation. It comes in paper. A letter, without any stamp, without return address. Obviously delivered by hand in my mailbox. That’s why I thought it was you who did it.
“It’s been a while since the last time I got mail. Yes, everybody is still getting spam, this or that newspaper that is basically a printout of ads from local traditional shops. So I almost dropped it together with the spam when I saw the yellow envelope. The sensation was weird. A letter. Nowadays. Still, my name was handwritten on it (can you write, by the way?) so I came back into my house, in my pyjama, to carefully open in the kitchen that object coming from the past. Inside the envelope there was a printout with a web address and a login name. Knowing like I know the ad business I obviously didn’t suspect anything but a fancy campaign so without hesitation I called a browser and logged in.”
“The fist impression is like any other social network. You get a newsfeed, and so on. But most of it is blurred out, and on the notification bar you have a score and a message menu. My message menu, in red, was containing a welcome letter and a button. After clicking on it, a new message came. And there was the challenge.”
“Challenges are not suggestions, neither menaces. But it is clear you need to complete them if you want to check what the others are doing: otherwise you only see the blurred area. My first challenge was simple: I was asked to go to a supermarket and slip something in the pocket of one of the clients. After that, I was supposed to accuse him of shoplifting.”
“After I was done with it, I must say, I wanted more. Then I got the rules: whatever I do will be given a mark, the mark will be translated onto points, and the points will allow me to see what the other foes are doing. There will be people commenting my actions, and giving me new ideas. A little bit like being a youtuber. So far so good.”
“The problem is what to do. I started easy. After the opening task, I decided to glue some locks. Then I crashed a party, last Friday, do you remember? I was not really drunken, I was acting, believe me. I got a lot of good remarks on that one. Then I broke the windows of a service car. Unfortunately, all what I got after all was like a hundred points. I started to feel shame on me. That’s why I’m telling you. Was I not good enough to do something interesting? Am I already done on foebook?”
– Probably, man. Don’t worry about it. I’m sure it’s good to be there, and without disclosing any information about my status, I can tell you that foebook is fundamentally malign. Don’t you see it? They only want to create mayhem, so that they can sell something afterwards. The question is what do they want to sell?
– I think I know what they want to sell. Security. What else?
– You’re right. Security is the most precious item you can buy nowadays. How much do you pay for your coverage?
– You mean house and personal and so on? I will not tell you man!
– A lot of money. A lot of money more than before the internet was born. Those were good days, don’t you think so?
– What do you know about it? The internet is there since decades before you were born! Or are you cheating me with your age?
– No cheating man. You can feel like there’s no internet when you go to the wild. Didn’t you go to the wild?
– The wild? I’m not interested!
– You should try it. It’s liberating.
– I also feel liberated when I go to the toilet. And I don’t need to fight bears or boars to feel that. I pass.